Grieving Together – What to Expect? – Part 2


Expect changes to routine
Routine will never be the same when you lose someone in your life. Every single step you make is a step of grief. Our ways to survive grief emotionally is by recreating new routines, or face the spaciousness left in those routines. Some people may choose to create new routines to shift the focus from grief to living a new life. Either way, managing routines from day to day is a process of coping with death. Expect changes in routines even if it may seem drastic. Adapt to the changes with an open heart.

Expect changes in behaviour
We are emotional beings. It is within our intelligence to express emotions as part of the healing process. People who are mourning experience changes in their behaviour. This is a natural process of recovering from grief. Despite that, none of these behaviours is easy to deal with especially if one is unconscious towards the behaviour. For example, the state of depression may force an individual to retreat from social interaction. Realising that death is inevitable, no social connection can fix what has happened. A state of anger causes damage on many levels too. It is essential to expect emotional turmoil and understand it before jumping into conclusion that this emotional instability must be fixed. Take anger for instance, it has a higher level of consciousness than grief. Allowing anger to be expressed would give the body a little more strength to recover from the grief.

What do we do in the face of grief especially when it affects our relationship? There is no shortcut to heal grief. Take life one step at a time. Any form of ‘fixing’ must come from a higher place of Love. Practice acceptance, and respect each other’s healing process. Get help if the grief begins to cause damage to own self and the relationship.